Sunday, July 18, 2010

Dear Oprah

Dear Oprah,

You do not know me, but well of course I know who you are. Everyone knows who you are. I have watched your show, read your magazine, and I enjoy your book club selections. I am therefor a supporter and a contributor to your enormously successful empire. In fact in one way or another I am sure that I have at least partially funded the purchase of one of your Prada bags or a pair of you Jimmy Choo's. So we could say that I am more or less a friend. A friend. You like to help your friends, don't you Oprah? Of course you do. You take friendships seriously. We all know about the strong bond you have with you BFF, Gail. You would probably go to great lengths to help Gail out, right? Of course you would.

I realize that our friendship is, well not on the same scale. So I won't ask for much. Not much at all. In grand scheme of things. But you see, the thing is Oprah, you have a lot of money. A lot. And I don't have as much, not nearly. And I would really like to have more... more of that money stuff. As it turns out, I really was meant to be wealthy. I have "champagne taste" as they would say. I like designer clothes, I like good wine, fancy food, and pretty things. The problem is I am on a budget. A budget that consistently prohibits the spur of the moment impulse buy. A budget that requires a Target label in place of a Vera Wang. It means that I have one day in Calistoga instead of the 2 or um... seven that I would prefer. It is a big sacrifice Oprah.

My own BFF and I just went to Calistoga for one little night. We stayed in a modestly priced hotel with a little spa. One night. Only one short 50 minute massage. I window shopped Oprah... window shopped, which is probably unheard of in your circles. It translates into -no purchases. Empty bags. A beautiful pair of sparkly earrings left in the display case.

My friend and I had a fabulous time, we were on our own away from the pressures of our day to day lives, working and raising two kids a piece. But we certainly would have benefited from a few more days, if only we could afford the room and the childcare.

Oprah, with your millions, or perhaps billions of dollars, certainly, certainly you could afford to sponsor an annual 4 day girls weekend to napa for my friend and I could you not? At best it would cost $3-4000 a year. For that we could stay in a very nice hotel. We could get the 90 minute massages, and throw in a mud bath. We could upgrade to the reserve tastings instead of the standard. We could hire sitters to take care of our regular mama duties while we were recharging our parental batteries. We would have the opportunity to reinforce the lifelong friendship that our day to day responsibilities often cause us to neglect.

Oprah, I realize that you have worked hard for your fortune. You put in long hours. You are smart and talented. But I promise, we work hard too. We work full days at the office and come home for the second shift with the kids. Yet my annual income is probably less than the compensation that you receive for one 45 minute appearance.

So what do you say media giant? Could you help two average ladies out? Just think for the cost of one trip to your stylist each year you could give us every day chicks a whole bunch of joy....

Just thought I would ask.

Your Friend,



  1. That's great! Let me know how that works out for ya! :)

  2. I soooooo hope she buys this!!!

  3. Love it! Maybe you can get a photoshoot for "O" magazine... a day in the life kind of thing or mommy make-over... the list could be endless! :-)

  4. Oh, I LOVE this idea! And I'm SURE Oprah is up for it. I mean really, who could say no to offering a little pleasure to an overworked, overwrought mama who just wants a little taste of paradise - not a bucketful, no, just a spoonful o' that sugar to make the real life go down just a little more smoothly. A little sugar, a little love, a little pocketful of gold...