Recently I saw a blog titled "People I want to punch in the throat." Sadly, this resonated with me. I couldn't help but think it was kind of... hysterical. Violent? Yes. Negative? Yes. Funny? Yes.
So today's post is titled "People I want to punch in the throat" *
#1: The two ladies I met in the Safeway parking lot on a rainy day last week. I was there with Julian in my arms,and Evan by my side. I was attempting to navigate my way through the busy parking lot without losing a child under the tires of a speeding vehicle. Have you ever noticed how crazy people get in a Safeway parking lot? For the love of God. The ladies looked at me. They shook their heads in disgust. One of the women opened up her big ol' mouth and snickered "Why don't your babies have on rain jackets? Tisk, tisk" I was headed for the store entrance and did not have time to turn around and explain (in the rain) why exactly my children were not wearing the appropriate rain gear. But here is why. I had spent the previous 10 minutes fighting with a three year old about the importance of wearing a rain jacket. I lost. Three year olds can be very persuasive when they are screaming in your ear and spitting at you. That's right. Spitting. It's his new thing. As for Julian, I don't even think they make rain jackets for 9 month olds, and if they do, I don't own one. I try to keep a hat on him, but he is already just as stubborn as his older brothers and pulls it off. Every. Single. Time. So Safeway ladies, that is why my babies were sans rain jackets. Mind your own damn business.
#3: All of the women at Evan's school who keep asking me if I want to serve on the Parent's Board and the Auction Committee. Sure they are well intentioned, but it is stressing me out. As it turns out I am just not one of those kinds of moms. You know, the kind of mom that likes planning all the fundraisers and organizing teacher appreciation day. I feel guilty about it. I do. But these mom's take this whole thing very seriously. They have job descriptions written for the various positions. I already have at least two jobs (Mom: AKA Personal Slave to three bossy boys) and part-time recruiter. I don't have the energy to head up the fundraising committee. I I don't know how these other mamas do it. Maybe they have more time than I do. Maybe they are just more super-awesome than I am. Either way, please, please stop asking me.
#4: Gotye. They sing "Somebody That I Used To Know". I am obsessed with this freaking song. It's catchy. It's emotional. It's sexy. It's stuck in my head 24x7 and I think it might drive me to doing something desperate like listening to Bill Harly's "Down in the Backpack" just to chase the damn song out of my head.
Okay. That's it. Off to my happy place.
*Disclaimer: Really, I'm not a violent person. No really.
What is up with bay area folks and kids? Remember that day when a lady gave your hard because Zack was riding a teeny little scooter on the sidewalk without a helmet? He was surrounded by adults who were hovering over him. Seems where you live people either hate kids and parents , or feel they have the right to air all their opinions on how you should be raising your kids.
ReplyDeleteMy typing is awful. I meant to type "gave you a hard time"
ReplyDeleteWhat is up with bay area folks and kids? Remember that day when a lady gave your hard because Zack was riding a teeny little scooter on the sidewalk without a helmet? He was surrounded by adults who were hovering over him. Seems where you live people either hate kids and parents , or feel they have the right to air all their opinions on how you should be raising your kids.
ReplyDeletehahah.. I LOVE the heading and this post! You should do a linky to it... so everyone can post on "people they want to punch in the throat" hahaha..
ReplyDeletePS: And I know Kimbra (the New Zealand chick who sings with Gotye on "somebody that I used to know") She's lovely!
Cheers, Juanita.
I don't think there's a single day that goes by without someone I'd like to punch. Good to know I'm not alone. Today's someone was the man on BART sitting in the handicapped/pregnant lady seats by the door who looked me up and down - couldn't possibly have missed the 9 months pregnant belly - and decided to close his eyes and go to sleep while I stood. Love you too, man. Arg. Makes me so mad.
ReplyDeleteOh Alice! I wrote many posts about this very topic about a year ago!! People suck! I'm sorry.
DeleteWhat a dirt-bag! :(
DeleteIs it wrong to want to punch myself in the throat just to avoid helping out in the classroom every Tuesday?! I seriously do not have the patience to "enjoy" it....in fact, I dread Tuesdays....with a passion!!
ReplyDeleteugh, I hate people that get in my business like that. Back off until you are trying to get two kids out to the door and to the grocery store!
ReplyDeleteHey, am I responsible for putting Gotye in your head? He's so lovely. Maybe get the album and replace it with his other songs?
ReplyDeleteI'm off to check out that punch in the throat blog. Sometimes we need one of those to make up for all the saccharine in blog world. My sister just sent me this one
http://fuckyournoguchicoffeetable.tumblr.com/
and it is so worth checking out if all those home styling blogs are leaving you feeling totally insufficient and envious (like I perpetually am)
Jo X.
I was totally in need of a post/rant like this. Thanks!
ReplyDelete1.) Um, those ladies in the parking lot? Are you serious???
ReplyDelete2.) I don't do committees either.
3.) I love that song too, and now I will go listen to it on youtube thankyouverymuch! :)
If I wrote a post about everyone I wanted to punch, It would make "War and Peace" look like a travel brochure. Its the exact reason I started my won blog, to let everyone know how much they piss me off.
ReplyDeleteArrogantSOB
Arrogant-sob.com