I used to get straight A's. I was once awarded a scholarship for "The Highest Ranking Senior" in the school of Child & Family Studies. Did I peak at 21?
I have never really won an award since. No real promotions. I am, decidedly mediocre. Middle of the road. Plain Jane.
So what??? Poor me. I'm not a super-star. Cry me a river- right? I know. Being average should be acceptable. Pleasant even. But for me, it is hard. If I had an ounce of athleticism , I would pursue the Olympics. If I had a little more vocal range and a wee-bit of rhythm , I would audition for every musical on the planet, if nothing more but for the sheer joy of competition.
But I know better. I am not bound to win any major awards. I am me. Plain-old -me. I am not going to win any scholarships, modeling contracts, Grammy awards, or even a VP position. That's it. If it was going to happen I would know by now. So I had better manage my expectations. Most of us never achieve great, at least not in the public sense. Most of us probably don't even give it a second thought.
So here I am. Nothing extraordinary. No longer an over achiever, just a mom. Just a wife. Just a contract recruiter. Just me.
For someone who has spent so much of her life trying to be the best, trying to be an A+++, it's hard to come to the terms with the fact that your a B.