Friday, September 30, 2011

Alert








































The Neighborhood Watch Committee is issuing an Alert.



















Please be on the lookout for Rachel Kargas/Alias Getrealmommy. It is believed that she is mentally unstable and possibly dangerous.





Rachel (photographed above) is five foot four, has an (unusually chic) short haircut and is covered in flea bites. She was last seen wearing a black tshirt stained with spit up and a pair of ill-fitting Old Navy maternity sweatpants.





She has been spotted wandering the area with her four month old baby strapped to her chest, pushing an empty red double stroller while screaming "Hurry Up! We're late" at her two disheveled sons trailing behind her. Based on her boys appearence there is concern that her sons are being emotionally abused and forced to wear miss-matching outfits.




While it is unlikely that Ms. Kargas is armed with anything more than one of her kitchen knives (which is too dull to cut string cheese), she is considered unstable and should be approached with caution.

6 comments:

  1. Very funny! Now I am really lookIng forward to our visit. What could be more inviting than a crazed daughter, three screaming boys and a house full of fleas?? Mama Mia!

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  2. that second to last paragraph made me guffaw! So frighteningly familiar!

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  3. You mean there is such a thing as T-shirts NOT stained with spit-up? Benjy actually asked me yesterday why I wear pajamas ALL THE TIME. Three is really, really, really hard. I'm living it too.

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  4. Will you please take a picture of you pulling back the shower curtain and trying to stab your husband in the shower with a butter knife? Or a stick of string cheese? I promise to post it at World's Worst Moms.;)

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  5. AWESOME!!!! You had me at "based on the boys' dishevelled appearance.." Bwahahaha!

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  6. Beautiful!!!!! My daughter accused me of neglecting her brother the other day on the basis of his clothes. I was hoping we could get through the winter without buying anything but I had to relent and get him some new jeans this week. Everything - from trakkies to jammies to jeans - had holes in the knees.

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