Labor Day. The end of summer. It's always a little sad, that last day at the pool, that last family barbecue. Today, the passing of this season holds extra meaning. I spent the past year anticipating summer. Through the rainy winter months my stomach grew and grew, while I held tight to the promise of warmer times, when damp cold would give way to sunshine and literally new life.
Julian was born just after Memorial Day, in the wee hours of May 31, 2011. As I held my new baby that rainy spring morning, I knew that I had an entire summer ahead of me. A summer filled with long afternoon walks and star lit nights, rocking my newborn to slumber.
We did not waste the past three months, they were well spent. We visited with family, attended every festival and fair that we could, we boarded a plane and traveled to Denver, we made the most of our time. Best of all, more than ever I was able to focus, focus on taking everything in. I spent moments just looking into the eyes of my new son. Perhaps because I know he is my last baby, I have worked at being present in the moment and I have taken many mental photographs. His chubby cheeks, his gummy smile, the softness of his hair. Spectacular.
September has come. Fall is upon us. School has started and life pushes forward. It happened too fast. Today, I gave away the last of Julian's newborn clothing, he has outgrown them. I will never have a need for a size 1 diaper again, and this gives me pause. A chapter is closing. Forever. So many milestones. My high school graduation. My first day of college. The day David proposed. Our wedding. Our first home. My 30th birthday. That first positive pregnancy test....
And here we are. My third son is three months. I will have no more babies. The real milestones are now those of my children. My beautiful (sometimes lousy) boys. I cannot believe I am here, that this is my life. So much of the time I still feel as if I am the child. A little girl in need of encouragement. But no, no, I am the grown up, the mommy, raising the next generation. It all moves so fast, one season to the next.
Summer is gone. It is time to move on. Back to work. On to the next stage. Closing a chapter.