Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Man vs. (very small) beasts

You plague me, you disgusting pests. You have infested my pets and my home, depositing itchy calling cards all over my body. Oh, how I itch. I have scratched each bite into a bloody scab, leaving me looking no less than diseased.

I have declared war, but you won round one. You survived your habitat being attacked with hot water, heavy vacuuming and pesticides. My brave four-legged soldiers endured toxic, humiliating baths, and yet you survived.

Do not think we are giving up. We will not surrender. Round two commenced today. More bathing, more pesticides, more vacuuming. We will wear you down. Your tiny bites cannot kill us, only drive me to insanity, making me more likely to get rid of your comfy homes forever. Yes, I will sacrifice my four legged friends for the sake of the greater good.

You must be banished and destroyed forever.

You haven't seen (or tasted) the last of me.

2 comments:

  1. Oh no! Battle on dear one, battle on. I wish you mucho success in this endeavor.

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