Thursday, February 21, 2013

The Great Swimsuit Debate

 The Great Swimsuit Debate.

The husband and I are headed out for the first extended (by extended I mean six days) vacation in years. We are going to Belize for a friend's wedding and I simply cannot wait. In discussing what I was packing, I informed my husband that I was bringing three swimsuits. Three one-piece swimsuits. His response was first Three? What do you need three for? I'm bringing one. Okay babe, clearly you do not understand the female species. Three swimsuits for five days on the beach is MODEST. Heck, if you watch the Real Housewives you would know that many women would be bringing ten plus! But I don't have Real Housewive cash, so I can't afford that many suits, thus I have three. 

His second reaction was of disappointment. All one-pieces? He asked, frowning. YES. I answered. All one-piece suits. Each one. Why? He asked. My answer? BECAUSE I HAVE HAD THREE C-SECTIONS and even though I have been working out like mad, my abs are not bikini worthy. He kindly disagreed, but I think that is because he is blinded by love. It doesn't matter, I am more comfortable in a one-piece which makes me much, much happier, and in my humble opinion a more attractive woman. I posted the conversation on Facebook, to mixed response.  Some women agreed with me, and others told me that one piece swimsuits are for old ladies, and I should at least consider a tankini. 

Sorry. No tankini. I think they are far frumpier than a good one piece. Kudos to all of you long lean women who can pull off the bikini. Hurray for you. There was a time in my life where I could too. But I'm 38 have had three children and look pretty damn good for all the wear and tear, just not bikini-good. And I'm fine with that. So gosh darn it, you should be fine with it too! 

Victoria's Secret
Tommy Bahama

I told my friend Katheryn that I would prove to her that the one piece can be "hot" so I am (shockingly) posting pictures of each of my suits to prove her WRONG.  What I have learned from this experience is that a) I do not have a future career as a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model and b) I am really, really white.

Victoria's Secret
And now....

Top ten reasons I can't wait to go on vacation

Rum at 2:00 in the afternoon, pool side.

A clean hotel room, with housekeeping everyday

Eating at restaurants that don't have a kid's menu, crayons or chocolate milk

Getting up at 10 am, lunch at 2pm , Nap at 4pm, dinner at 8pm, bed at 12am.

(Most likely) not having anyone tell me that they hate me for a good six days.

Giving my brain a rest from determining who should get the purple marker, the red hot-wheel or the yellow bowl.

No diapers.

Cold beer on the beach.

Being at the ocean without having to console someone over a crushed sandcastle, split juice or the DREADED sunscreen application.

SIX BLISSFUL DAYS of sleeping in the sun, pina coladas, proving that the one-piece swimming suit has made a sexy comeback , the husband and NO RESPONSIBILITY!



  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    1. Alice, I am new to the comment moderation thing, did not mean to delete your comment. Started moderating b/c I was getting so much spam. THank you for your comment! Green one is Tommy Bahama, the other to VS. :)

  2. Love all of them - but fave is Tommy Bahama - I love anything green. And you do look just want to see skin, that's all. You will be happy and look great!

  3. wow! hot mama! the green is my fav.....

  4. No kids, even?! Now that's a vacation! We're doing Disney, so it will be the opposite.

    I think they all look pretty good, but it's hard to tell, since I had to squint to avoid that white glare in all those pictures. ;-)

  5. I'll start saying I hate you starting Tuesday. Until then, I love you. You look beautiful in them all!

  6. Ok. Starting Tuesday I will tell you I hate you. Nuntil then, I love you

  7. I like the green first, the purple second and the black third. I wear one pieces but always bring two pieces because I'm always amazed that everyone's wearing two pieces, even people you wouldn't think would want to. Since I work out like a lunatic and my abs are the one part of my body I love and no bathing suit will cover my upper thighs, the part of me that really needs covering (unless it's a suit from the 1920s!) I figure, why not show the best part of me? Have fun!

  8. I agree with you, Rachel...I think tankinis are terrible and really just show the piece of skin in the middle you really want to hide...the under belly button tummy bulge....aaaarggghhh!

    You do look amazing, though...rock those 1 pieces, Girl!

    I know you'll have a blast!

    By the way, you won the Photoshoot over at my blog!!! Hooray! Looks like you'll get that family portrait you always wanted :)

    Please email me at paintmyselfpretty(at)yahoo(dot)com.


  9. Love that Swimsuit in the Third photo and matching cover up!

    One Piece Swimsuits

  10. I love one-piece swimsuit too. It made me cover some of my excess fats in my belly area. And I felt sexy wearing it. And by the way, you really look stunning in your green one-piece swimsuit.