I don't want to know.

I walk around carrying a $20 backpack from Target. I no longer carry a purse, or even my trendy $200 diaper bag. My ugly pack is more practical.

What is happening to me?

I wear running shows everyday. On a rare occasion, you might see me sporting a slightly more fashionable beat up pair of Sketchers, but mostly it's my dirty running shoes. I walk a lot after all. My heals just don't cut it.

What is happening to me?

I have been wearing the same pair of diamond stud earrings for two weeks. I have hundreds of beautiful earrings that I adore. With my short hair I really can rock the big "statement" pieces. But it's too much effort to pick out the right accessories, and I am in a hurry in the morning. So simple studs it is

What is happening to me?

I am looking forward with much anticipation to my first concert in ages. Dan Zanes. 11 am. Apple juice is extra.

What is happening to me?

I haven't been to a real bar in a couple of years now. Happy hour- that would be impossible. I don't even think I would take advantage of the specials, they only offer the cheap "house" wine at happy hour price, and I don't drink cheap wine. It gives me a headache.

What is happening to me?

I rang in 2010 at 6:30pm. It was a crazy night. There were party hats.

What is happening to me?

I consider goldfish crackers and honey nut cheerios excellent snack options.

What is happening to me?

I hear myself thinking "shut up or I'll give you something to cry about" (no I haven't actually said it...yet)

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME???

Do me a favor, don't answer that question.