Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Sad Day

I can't help it. I am sad. Sad, sad, sad, sad. I cannot be witty or funny or anything but sad.

Tonight was for me, the last night of my beloved June Babies playgroup. The group will go on, and rightfully so, but I will no longer be there. Just before receiving the news of our move, my friend and fellow June Baby Mama, started a book club which I was excited to join. The first book we were to read was "The Friday Night Knitting Club". The book was by no means a work of art, however I related to the story, and found it ironic to be reading it at this time in my life. The novel tells a story of a diverse group of women who come together as they share a mutual love for craft. In the end the heroine dies of cancer, however the group remains, and each woman finds strength and success through the support of one another. The June Babies group is my knitting club. And although I am no heroine, I am the one leaving. Admittedly, moving to Berkeley California is hardly equivalent to dying, but I almost feel as though I am at my own funeral, and catching a glimpse of life post-Rachel.

So tonight I shared tears and hugs with my girlfriends. I am so grateful to have had such amazing ladies in my life. I know that I cannot go on "mourning" forever, and that once we settle in California, I need to adopt a more positive attitude. Life will be different. I will be challenged. It is hard to start over from nothing. I am so proud of the life I have built here, but I will have to suck it up so to speak, and move on, because everyone else will.

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