A Gift For You!

This has been a long summer of sitting on my tush. With my busted ankle, I have had a lot of time to hang out on Facebook, something my “friends” are brutally aware of.  I have posted no fewer than several hundred “adorable” pictures of my kids and nearly daily updates on the status of my hair transformation project.  Yes.  I am a Facebook junkie.

And guess what? Now I have another reason to spend time on my favorite social networking site. I can send presents to my friends… for FREE. It’s a very cool idea, brought to us by the geniuses at the social gifting service Embly. Because I am so well connected, (play along with me now) I was privileged to be one of the first to try Embly out and I have to say it is pretty slick.

How does it work? Embly finds the important events in your friends’ lives and works with retailers to create free gifts that you can use to celebrate them, Your friend gets a thoughtful gift, the retailer gets a visitor from a valued or new customer, and you get the thanks!

Essentially, I can hop on Embly and send a free gift, buy a gift card, or just send a message to any of my friends via Facebook or email. All it takes is a few clicks of the mouse and I look like I really care. (Because, duh, of course I do.) 

So far I have been really impressed with the retailer selection including Bloom, Diamond Candles, Shutterfly, and ShoeDazzle.  I was gifted a $15 card to Bloom, the leading social beauty network where you can get tips from pros and shop their recommended products, and I bought a lip gloss I adore.  I have given the Bloom gift card to several of my friends for no reason at all, and now my lucky readers, I am giving you a gift card as well! (Okay, those geniuses over at Embly are making this possible.) All you have to do is click my link to get a free $15 at Bloom, and then you too can start in the gifting/shopping fun!  Bonus points for you if you leave a comment and tell me what you picked out.

Click here to join Embly & get your gift; $15 at Bloom

Happy Shopping!!

Bad Jew

Disclaimer: I know that I have readers from all over the place, people with different beliefs, values and religions. I mean no disrespect with this post, and I hope that I do not offend anyone. Just keeping it REAL.

I am not a religious person. I do not have specific beliefs about God, I don't go to church or synagogue, or even pray. But I consider myself a Jew. I'm what some would call a "cultural Jew." Being Jewish is my heritage. Celebrating passover, eating lox and dropping an occasional Yiddish word is part of my cultural identity, just like a Swed may serve lutefisk and name their kid Sven.

I'm a pretty bad Jew. I don't know Hebrew. I don't belong to a temple, I didn't marry a member of the tribe, I don't fast on Yom Kippur, and I don't know how to make a brisket. Bad Jew.

But every once and a while, usually around the high-holidays, I decide to make an effort. I hadn't planned on taking the boys to Rosh Hashanah services, but on Sunday evening I was talking to Zack about the holiday and he told me "Well I'm not Jewish. Daddy is Christian." Take a moment and let that sink in.

At first I chuckled and said "Daddy isn't Christian. He just celebrates Christmas." My husband was raised Lutheran, but to call him a Christian is an absolute joke, unless Christianity is defined solely by Santa Claus & the Easter Bunny. We do celebrate those holidays, as it is part of my husband's family traditions, but it bothers me that my kids identify more with Christmas than Rosh Hashanah. (Of course who can blame a kid. Presents and candy versus, services and apples.) I explained to Zack that he is part of both daddy and I, so he is in fact, Jewish. And I decided we were GOING TO CELEBRATE THE DAMN HOLIDAY. And we did. It was lovely.

I kept the boys home from school and we went to the children's service at the Berkeley JCC. It was a half an hour of songs, diaper changes and meltdowns, but it was nice to be there, surrounded by my people. The service was followed by apples and honey, challah and manischewitz wine. I spent the rest of the day simply being with my kids. We went to the book store, we made honey cake, played games and ate more apples and honey. We talked briefly about the idea of a new beginning and what we would like to do differently in the next year. It was a perfect day.

At the end of the evening my husband asked the kids how they liked Rosh Hashanah, and they answered with an enthusiastic "Great!" I knew I had done my job and that for one day, I was a good Jew.

Shana Tova.

Getting Evan to "dress up" for the services was almost impossible.

STAY TUNED!!! On Thursday I am going to announce my first ever sponsored give away! I will be giving away a very cool prize to my readers-no contest, just free stuff! Come back on Thursday and claim your gift!

Vacation Rental Property: Looking for something different?

Tired of those stuffy vacation rental properties that are so pristine you are afraid to touch anything? Bored of those sterile homes with gleaming counter-tops and organized closets? Looking for something a little more "homey?"

Come visit the Kargas family home in Oakland Ca. We have a comfortable property in the heart of Oakland, so close to the bus stop you can hear the bus pass by. Each. And. Every. Time. We have three bedrooms, four baths and a large kitchen that has clearly been loved. You will feel right at home in our spacious three story home, and you won't feel the least bit concerned about keeping the place tidy. Our home will evoke fond memories of your eccentric great aunt, the cat lady, who couldn't remember which day was trash day.

What is more, our home comes with three of your very own personal assistants! That's right, three little "helpers" who will be at your side day and night. Your helpers will provide you with meal recommendations, and will thoughtfully critique your cooking, constantly. They will provide you with entertainment, reenacting WWW II and initiating food fights. There is a complementary wake up call, provided every day at 6:45am, so you will be sure not to miss a thing! Our helpers are so diligent, that they will likely check on you several times throughout the night, making sure there have been no monster invasions, or that you haven't (also) wet the bed.

Interested? We are available any time, and our prices are very reasonable. Leave us a comment below and we can discuss availability!

My (not) Running Comeback

Maybe my last run ever? :(

It has been a while since I have posted. I had planned a whole "Running Comeback" series, and even took this cute picture of Zack and I on Labor Day after he took his bike and joined me on my run around the lake. It was a great bonding moment, and I was thrilled, until a couple of hours later my ankle started to swell.... and hurt. As it turns out our Labor Day jog will probably be my last in a very long time. I fractured my right ankle again, this time on the other side. It is a stress fracture presumably brought on by my light running. Not only am I back in the dreadful boot again, unable to exercise or walk my kids to school, I'm in pain and left wondering what the hell is going on with my body?  My ankle specialist recommended I get a bone density test to see if my bones are thinning. I am a prime candidate for early bone loss, I have a small frame and tiny bones. I am anxiously waiting for my primary care doctor to authorize a test.

If I do have some sort of osteoporosis, I suppose it isn't the end of the world. I am sure there are drugs and vitamins I can take, but it worries me. What will my body be like in another twenty years? Do I have to give up running and high-impact exercise all together? I'm only 38.  

 So this week has been a difficult one. I have more to share, but that story is not my own. We have people close to us who are going through some difficult times, and it has hung a sad dark cloud over our recent days. With worry for them, it does make my own problems seem small.

Sorry for the less-than-witty-doom-and-gloom post. I have wanted to write something, but this is all I can come up with today.

Pop Fizz: Fifty Shades Of Stupid

My latest idea for a blog series? Pop Fizz

What's that? Well most of my readers are aware that  I love People Magazine. Clarification, I love to hate it, but whatever. For me it is like a car accident and I just can't look away. Why should I care about Lindsay Lohan? Why should I have any interest in what Snookie's nursery looks like? I'm too smart for all that, right? Don't answer that.

It is safe to say that I love to bitch about celebrities and the culture that surrounds them. Thus, this series will be dedicated to pop stars/celebs/culture and how it all annoys me, falls flat and fizzles out. (Clever huh?)
 To kick off the series I'm starting with....

FIFTY SHADES OF STUPID. (err, GREY)

Far too much has already been written on the topic, so I'll keep it brief. This is the worst piece of smut I have ever read. Okay, admittedly I don't have much experience in reading smut, but I am sure that this must top the list. Perhaps what really bothers me is that the book tries to disguise itself as an actual novel. With a plot. I don't think so. In fact, I don't think the storyline is anymore sophisticated than soft porn. In a porn movie you might find a housewife in a silky robe opening up the door to a plumber in tight jeans, and a shirt undone to his belly button highlighting his six pack. She bends over to show him where the leak under the sink is and....well you get the point. Pretty much the same thing with Christian Grey and Anastasia. She walks into his office to conduct an interview, bites her lip a few times and totally seduces a multi millionaire CEO, who, while running his empire finds plenty of time to draft up sexual contracts and bang his "girlfriend" 15 times a day.

Maybe porn is your thing. I'm not a prude, that's fine with me. However readers are actually approaching this like it's a legitimate book, one that deserves to be discussed over coffee and scones while at book club. They have no embarrassment while proclaiming on Facebook "So addicted to Fifty Shades! Just can't put it down!" Honestly, you might has well be shouting out to the world "I can't put down my Penthouse Magazine! I'm totally getting off on it!" Who would do that? Nobody. But ladies, that is exactly what you are doing. Exactly. It is fascinating really, how this silly little "novel" has outed so many women who secretly, or unknowingly like SMUT.

I can honestly say however, that I am not not one of those women. No. Fifty Shades Of Stupid did nothing for me. Nothing.

Kargas Inc. Reviewed On Yelp

Kargas Inc 

3 reviews

P.Nutt:

* 8/31/12

If I could give this place zero stars I would! My brother and I visited Kargas Inc earlier this week for a play date. What a disappointment! Let's start with the snack selection shall we? We were offered stale raisins, over-ripe bananas and toast. Seriously? They were also out of juice. Who runs out of juice for a play date? Next, on to the atmosphere. The place was a mess, totally unsanitary. Who wants to look at a pile of dirty underwear or step in a puddle of cat vomit? Nasty. The toys were totally lame. Most of the play things were missing parts or broken. I saw one staff member playing with a beheaded Captain America doll, so not cool. Speaking of the staff, the woman who runs the place is a total witch. She has all these crazy rules about not running with scissors or playing with sharp knives, total buzz kill. In short, do not go to Kargas Inc. You have been warned.

Q.T. Pie:

*** 8/20/12

My recent visit to Kargas Inc was just o.k. On the plus side, upon entering the facility I was offered Cheese-Its and chocolate milk. These are not the usual selections at our home, since we make an effort to eat healthy, organic food, but it was a nice treat when visiting Kargas Inc. On the negative side, the place had a funky "aroma." It may have been due to the cup of spoiled milk I found behind the sofa. Don't know if I'll go back. 

Tinkerbell:

* 7/15/12

Bottom line, I had a terrible experience with the staff. One staff member, who had no grasp of the English language and drooled a lot, took my shoes (which I graciously removed upon entering) and PUT THEM IN THE TOILET! Who does that? When I informed management, I got an apology, but I wasn't even compensated for the trauma! The folks over at Kargas Inc. need a serious lesson in customer service.

People I Want To Punch In The Face: Celebs

Okay, so enough with the sap. Let's get busy being bitter and angry.

Welcome to the celebrity edition of "People I Want To Punch In The Face"

I was going to start of with Todd Akin, but that is just too damn obvious, he isn't actually a celebrity, and I am sure millions of people have blogged more articulately about the Congressman who missed 6th grade health class, so I'll move on.

Paris Hilton: I know, Paris Hilton is so 2005. You don't see much about the blond heiress anymore, other than an occasional picture in US Weekly. But I have to include her on this list. Why? Because years and years ago my husband asked me to declare a nemesis. He had named Dave Thomas (of Wendy's) as his, for some unknown reason. Now that Mr. Thomas has passed away, I thought my man had the option of selecting a new nemesis, so he added Phil Collins to the list. Don't ask.  I didn't have to think very hard about mine, I informed my husband that my nemesis was Paris Hilton. At the time, Paris was all over the media, doing her show with Nicole Richie and carrying around a pint-sized dog accessory to match her designer outfits. I'm not sure why I dislike that woman so much. Perhaps it is that smirk on her face. She just oozes "Mean Girl." I bet she picked on girls like me her whole life. Paris is one of those women who are famous simply for being famous (think Kim Kardashian.) Paris has no real talent, she isn't even particularly attractive. What Paris has is money. What Paris has is connections. What Paris has is her skinny body and bleach blond hair. She makes my skin crawl. Seriously.

Rachel Zoe: Yes, I have watched her show. I don't know why. She bugs the hell out of me, especially once she got knocked up. The whole season she was pregnant all we heard about was how hard she was working, how she just kept going and going and going, and how she needed to slow down. Oh poor, poor millionaire Rachel. She had to have a photo shoot, she had to decide on THREE dresses for XYZ celebrity's red carpet moment. Cry. Me. A. River. Now that she has her little boy, Skyler, he makes a nice fashion accessory. That kid's wardrobe probably costs more than I'm capable of earning in a decade. He wears a fedora! He wears a white pinstriped suit! Really? Because my baby refuses a hat. My baby would destroy a white suit in three seconds flat.  Ms. Zoe's house is all white too, by the way. Like a blank slate for blueberry stains and mashed crayons. Give me a break. Rachel, your kid isn't having any fun if he is that clean all the time.

Gordon Ramsay: Does anybody really believe this guy is for real? Was there ever a show more boring than "Hell's Kitchen?" It's a bunch of uneducated line cooks competing for a spot in one of his restaurants. They are a bunch of idiots and Gordon thinks that he is entertaining his viewers by screaming and yelling at them Actually Ramsay, you are just putting me to sleep. I hear now he is on to hotels. That is one show I will not watch. 


That's all I have time for today. Hope you enjoyed my rant.